Sunday, December 12, 2010

I Am Pretending That My Baby Is Adopted’

I Am Pretending That My Baby Is Adopted’
As told to ANA KRISTINE B. VALENZUELA
Published MOD May 2010

THE first time that Mirdianne* learned that she was pregnant, she cried-but they were not tears of joy.
At 28, Mirdianne was at that stage which many would consider the right age to have a baby. Also, she had a stable job working for the finance department of a retail company, so she could provide for her child.
But she and Lito, an officemate who worked for the logistics department, were not ready for parenthood. They were just having fun, they succumbed to their passions, but they were careful... or so they thought.
At first, Mirdianne noticed her menstruation skipping. But she didn’t bother about it because after all, she had an irregular pattern. But five months after, she still didn’t have that monthly visit. So she decided to have a home pregnancy test. The test turned out positive.
She didn’t know how to tell Lito. Things were complicated. They weren’t formally a couple. People in the office didn’t even know that they were going out.
Nevertheless, abortion did not cross her mind. Yet, she did not know what to do. So, she searched the Internet for answers. She found emotional support. The first person she told about her pregnancy was a pro-life minister, whom she met online.
Later on, she found the courage to tell her mother and sister, who were both in the province. She went home and told them, but they decided to keep it first from the rest of the family, including her father. Their plan: she would live in a home for women in crisis until she gives birth. Then she will legally adopt her own baby. She will tell people that the baby belongs to a less fortunate woman and that she’s adopting the baby out of charity.
Today, Mirdianne is one of the women housed at Grace To Be Born. She found a refuge in this non-government organization which helps women in crisis, especially giving shelter to pregnant women who do not want to resort to abortion. At Grace To Be Born, she is learning how to take care of babies by looking after babies of other women in the home.
Now she has accepted her baby-a boy-wholeheartedly and plans to name him Samuel, a character from the Bible who was adopted by a priest.
Things are still complicated with Lito, though. He still sends her text messages, but he doesn’t give any financial or emotional support, which Mirdianne is not hoping for anymore.
Mirdianne is on maternity leave, even as her officemates still do not know who the father of her child is. She has to work to be able to provide for her baby, but she plans to look for a job in another company.
“I will raise him up as my adopted child,” Mirdianne says of the baby she will deliver anytime soon. “But when the time comes that he can already understand, I will tell him the truth.”

Note: *Although events in the story are true, names of places, persons, and some circumstances have been altered to protect the identity of those involved. Any similarity to actual names of places and persons, whether living or deceased, is purely coincidental.