Friday, January 06, 2006

A woman undone

There was this episode of friends where Monica and Phoebe were taking care of a guy in a coma. They were wondering what he was like; that he was smart and artistic, and that he was the type of guy who really listens to you and doesn’t imagine you naked. When the coma guy awoke, he didn’t know who Monica and Phoebe were. They were the ones taking care of him. So he said thank you. But they wanted more than that, more than thank you and I’ll call you. Monica said something like “we give and we give and then one day you wake up and I’ll call you”

I have this three-year crush on Tortillos (hi Trish!) Whenever I see him I feel like I’m floating on cloud nine, ecstasy, and sheer bliss. I don’t even get to talk to him. He doesn’t even know that I exist. But his face seems to automatically inject a huge smile unto my face and that moment would seem to last throughout the day, I would feel jovial, oh so happy. I really think that nothing is ever gonna happen. Even my dreams tell me so, I cant even get him in my dreams.
Dreams are supposed to be that happy place where reality isn’t true (like me flying). It is where imagination takes off to a faraway land ends in a happy ever after. But then I get so pathetic as to I can not even get Tortillos in my dream.

So what is the problem?
Men? Women? Or is it just me? I guess all of us do have a problem here…like my inability to converse with the opposite sex, (yes, and they call me a bitch, a flirt.. hmm?)
Or maybe sometimes we just expect too much?
Expect that the person we like will like us back? Expect that he’s perfect? It doesn’t always work that way, right? I guess it is also because we spent time fantasizing about the other person so much so that if it doesn’t turn out the way that we planned it to be we get devastated. Either he likes us back or he turns out to be perfect, exactly what you wanted. We just have to be contented with what is with us. Enjoy whatever it is that life has to offer, and let the rest be for eye candy.

In that episode of friends, Chandler commented ‘are there no conscious guys in the city left for you two?’ or something to that effect.

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